Goals of the discipline Policy

1. Discipline protects the child from danger;
2. Discipline helps the child learn self-control and self-discipline;
3. Discipline helps the child develop a sense of responsibility;
4. Discipline helps instill values;

The goal of effective discipline is to foster acceptable and appropriate behaviour in the child.  Disciplining children is one of the most important yet difficult responsibilities of our staff and there can be no short cuts.  The foundation of effective discipline is respect.  The child needs to be able to respect their care giver’s authority and the rights of others in their group.  Effective discipline means that our discipline policy be applied with mutual respect in a firm, fair, reasonable and consistent way.  The goal is to first protect the child from danger and then to help the child learn self-discipline, to develop a healthy conscience and internal sense of responsibility and control.  It should also instill values.  Harsh discipline tactics such as humiliation, verbal abuse, shouting or name calling, will not be tolerated in the day care or on our property by any staff member, guardian or parent.

Forms of Discipline
We use three forms of discipline at the day care.

1. redirection.
2. reasoning, or away-from-the-moment discussion;
3. time-out;

1. Redirection
With this technique, the caregiver suggests or physically gives the child a different task or toy to stop the undesirable behaviour.  The child may need to be redirected to a different play centre or work table by the caregiver.  This technique is used first and foremost by our staff with all ages of children.

2. Reasoning or away-from-the-moment discussions
Discipline involves teaching positive behaviour as well as changing unwanted behaviour.  That is, children need to know what to do as well as what not to do.  In general, it is more effective to anticipate and prevent undesirable behaviour than to punish it.  “Away from the moment” refers to dealing with the difficult behaviour not in the heat of the moment, but rather in advance or away from the actual misbehaviour.  An away-from-the-moment discussion can help prevent undesirable behaviour by giving the caregiver the opportunity to teach children the desirable behaviour in advance.  eg  the children will have a “reading time” and the care giver explains the need to be careful and respectful with the books so everyone can enjoy them. This technique is not appropriate for children under three years of age but is the second choice for our staff.

3. Time-Outs
Time-outs are one of the most effective disciplinary techniques available to caregivers.  The time out strategy is effective because it keeps the child from receiving any attention that could reinforce the negative behaviour.  Like any other procedure, time-out must be used correctly to be effective.  It must be used unemotionally and consistently every time the child misbehaves.  This is the third choice of our staff and is most effective for ages 30 months to 8 years.

1. we introduce time-out at 24 months;
2. the place of the time out is in the child’s room, but sitting on a chair in view of the rest of the group;
3. time-out lasts one min. for each year the child is old to a maximum of 5 min.;
4. we prepare the child for the time out by briefly saying what the misbehavior was, eg. “no hitting”, “no biting”;
5. when the child is on time-out he is not included in anything that may be happening within the rest of the group;
6. the caregiver is the time keeper
7. when time out is over, it is no longer discussed.  A new activity may be offered or inclusion in the group activity and move on.

Developmental Considerations

Early Toddlers (12-36 mo.)

• at the early toddler stage, it is normal and necessary for toddlers to experiment with control of the physical world and with the capacity to exercise their own will versus that of others.  Consequently, tolerance is recommended.  Disciplinary interventions are necessary to ensure the toddler’s safety, limit aggression, and prevent destructive behavior.  Removing the child or the object with a firm “No, thank you” or another very brief verbal explanation (“No – hot!”), and redirecting the child to an alternative activity usually works.  The caregiver should remain vigilant  with the child at such times to and ensure that the behaviour does not recur, and also to assure the child that the caregiver is not withdrawing their attention.  Early toddlers are very susceptible to fears of abandonment and will not be kept in “time-out” out of sight of the rest of the group.  Early toddlers are not generally verbal enough to understand or mature enough to respond to verbal prohibitions.  Therefore, verbal directions and explanations are unreliable forms of discipline for this age group.

Late Toddlers  (2 to 3 years)

• The struggle for mastery, independence and self-assertion continues with this age group.  The child’s frustration at realizing limitations in such struggles leads to temper outbursts.  This does not necessarily express anger or willful defiance.  The caregiver should have empathy, realizing the meaning of these manifestations.  At the same time, the caregiver
• should continue to supervise, set limits and routines, and have realistic expectations of the child’s achievement capabilities.  Knowing the child’s pattern of reactions helps prevent situations in which frustrations flare up.  When the child regains control, the caregiver should give some simple verbal explanation and reassurance.  The child should be redirected to some other activity, preferably away from the scene of the tantrum.  The toddler cannot regulate behaviour based on verbal prohibitions or directions alone.

Preschoolers (three to five years)

• At three years to five years of age, most children are able to accept reality and imitations, act in ways to obtain others’ approval, and be self-reliant for their immediate needs.  However, they have not internalized many rules, are gullible, and their judgment is not always sound.  They require good behavioural models after which to pattern their own behaviour.  The consistency should apply not only in the rules and actions of the primary caregiver, but in other adults who care the child within the day care.
• Reliance on verbal rules increases, but still the child requires supervision to carry through directions and for safety.  Time-out can be used if the child loses control.  Redirection or small consequences related to and immediately following the misbehaviour are other alternatives used in the day care.  Approval and praise are the most powerful motivators for good behaviour for this age group. 

Example: The preschooler draws on the wall with crayons.  Use time-out to allow him to think about the misbehaviour.  Consider using logical consequences, eg. not allowed to use the crayons and the child cleans up the mess to teach accountability.

Setting Rules

Rules are established for children so they can learn to live cooperatively with others, to teach them to distinguish right from wrong, and to protect them from harm.  Children raised without reasonable limits will have difficulty adjusting socially.  The following are some ways that parents can use rules and limits to promote effective discipline:

• reinforce desirable behaviour.  Praise prositive behaviour and “catch children being good”;
• Avoid nagging and making threats without consequences.  The latter may even encourage the undesired behaviour;
• Apply rules consistently;
• Ignore unimportant and irrelevant behaviour, eg, swinging legs while sitting;
• Set reasonable and consistent limits.  Consequences need to be realistic;
• State acceptable and appropriate behaviour that is attainable;
• Prioritize rules.  Give top priority to safety, then to correcting behaviour that harms people and property, and then to behaviour such as whining, temper tantrums and interrupting.  Concentrate on two or three rules at first
• Know and accept age-appropriate behaviour.  Accidental spills are normal and not willful defiance.  On the other hand, a child who refuses to wear a bicycle helmet after repeated warnings is being willfully defiant.
• Allow for the child’s temperament and individuality (goodness of fit).  A strong-willed child needs to be handled differently from the so called “compliant child”.

Applying Consequences

• Apply consequences as soon as possible;
• Do not enter into arguments with the child during the correction process;
• Make the consequences brief.  For example, time-out should last one minute per year of the child’s age, to a maximum of 5 min.;
• Caregiver should mean what they say and say it without shouting at the child.  Verbal abuse will not be tolerated;
• Follow consequences with a form a affection (eg. hug), and ensure that the child knows the correction is directed against the behaviour and not the person.

As children learn by example, model forgiveness and avoid bringing up past mistakes.

References:

1. Howard BJ.  Discipline in early childhood;
2. Blum NJ, Williams GE, Friman PC.  Disciplining your children;
3. Adapted from article CPS position statement:  Effective discipline for children and Effective discipline: A healthy approach on website: www.caringforkids.cps.ca